Jackie

I feel a cold weakness in my lower belly as Daniel leads me to the brick platform in this dank basement. Our shadows cast by Zee's Dad's Coleman lantern dance across the far wall in front of us as we walk toward the raised brick platform and the fear is making me feel loose in my hips and knees, so I lean against Daniel and his arm slips around me like it belongs there. Daniel makes a small joke and I giggle nervously even though I don't really hear what he said.

I am scared.

I try to distract myself by tuning in to what is around me ... Val and Kevin are just walking into the basement behind us after he blazed outside and she took a couple hits to calm her nerves and I hear them going over about how things will work tonight. Val gave me a tab of ecstasy that she was planning on taking but changed her mind and I have it in my front jeans' pocket 'just-in-case' and I'm not ashamed to admit that I just might slip it under my tongue to take the edge off.

I see that Laura is settling into her old grungy bathtub and Zee is off looking for something to sit on in the pile of cast-off furniture on the dark side of the basement. Laura is leaning back in the bathtub still dressed - she looks like she's trying the tub on for size even though we've snuck in here at least ten times to talk about this night and Laura has laid back in that tub before and described how it will be when Zee uses a knife to mutilate her belly and how she plans on holding herself still and totally experiencing it. A 'midline gutting' is what Laura calls it. She is obsessed with midline guttings and total impalements and has shown me dozens of pictures off the web of both. They are fake, she says, but a few look pretty damned real to me.

Behind Laura I see Cassandra peeling her jeans off over her bum then wiggling out of her panties as G-Dog kneels in front of the old armchair that smells like piss. Cass says she is going to start by being fist-fucked and when it's time is going to impale herself on the old waterpipe that is sticking up out of the floor, then gut herself and have G-Dog choke her out. Part of me is suspicious that this might be Cass' way of giving herself an out - that once we're all dead or dying, she'll still be able to change her mind. I know I shouldn't think that way but she is the only one that has chosen to start with something that won't be lethal within minutes of starting.

Now we're at the brick platform and I move free of Daniel's arm to step up onto it. I see that Daniel has swept it clean for me and as I set my foot down onto it hits me that I'm going to die right here on these bricks tonight. And I see the eight foot steel shaft he has made in shop class and sharpened and polished so it is smooth as glass. And I see the large bottle of olive oil that he brought to lube it with. And seeing those things makes my knees give out on me and my hips lose all their strength and I crumple and Daniel is there, helping me up and lowering me to sit and I start to cry. I draw my knees up under my chin and hug my legs tight to me.

I've never been this scared in my life.

I feel like there is ice water in my bowels and all my strength is gone and I want to run so bad and never look back but my friends are here and we promised each other and I know that if I run now I will be overcome with guilt for the rest of my life that they died down here tonight and I didn't.

And Daniel is here and he is holding me in his arms and saying soft things to me that I don't really hear, but his voice is kind and soothing and I can hear that so I let myself be settled. I feel so small and so frail in his arms - like a little girl again.

I hear Cassandra moaning and look up to watch as G-Dog goes down on her and starts finger-fucking her and that is so hot that I feel a little tingling in my lower belly where my sex lives and I start to feel aroused. Laura promised me that I would be aroused tonight. She told me that impaling would guarantee me at least one orgasm, probably more. I believe she's right because since we started planning this night I've been doing anal to myself as I masturbate at night and my orgasms are way stronger. And the deeper I slide my toys the stronger I cum. I tried to work up the courage to let a boy fuck me anally, but never could do it.

And I took Laura's advice today and gave myself hot soapy enemas until only clean water came out and I only drank water and ate a few bananas today so my muscles don't cramp.

I look around now and see that Zee is undressing Laura - beautiful Laura-May - I love her body and her full round breasts and her long smooth belly and I want nothing more than to go to her right now and lay in that tub with her and feel her skin against mine and her full body against my skinny one and touch her and be touched by her like we did when we thought we were lesbians in grade 8. But she is with Zee now and I know he will treat her well and do everything just the way she wants it done.

Val is standing between me and the lantern and she is facing me as Kevin is tying her hands behind her back. She doesn't look at me, only stares at something over my head.

And I hear Cass cry out and see that G-Dog has three fingers in her already and she's getting close to cumming. She's going to cum a lot tonight, I just know it.

I'm the only one who hasn't started, so I reach up and try to unbutton my blouse but my hands are shaking so badly that I only manage to fumble one button open. Daniel takes my hands and squeezes them and lays them in my lap and starts to undress me. And as he does I feel my fear but I also feel a distant arousal start to build. As he takes my clothes off me, I feel my body trembling and I start to feel short of breath and start panting. While he is pulling off my top I quickly dig in the pocket of my jeans and pop the tab of ecstasy into my mouth and bite down on it, letting the powder slide under my tongue. I hope it will kick in before things go too much further - I know that chewing them makes it happen faster ...

I am naked now and sitting on the bricks and Daniel gathers me in his arms and cups my sex with one hand. With his other hand he strokes my left nipple - my breasts are small, but my nipples are so very sensitive. I don't like how my body looks very much - I think I'm too skinny and boney, but Daniel has always said he likes me that way so I don't feel as self-conscious with him than I do with other boys. I snuggle in as he finds my wetness and hooks a finger inside me and pulls. I love that move - it really starts me flowing toward an orgasm because it presses on my g-spot. That's another thing Laura taught me all about - how to find and play with my g-spot and those orgasms are the best because they come from deep inside my belly.

I look over at Laura and see that Zee has his hand between her open thighs and is working her too. Her eyelids are drooping like they do when she gets sexually aroused and I can hear her quivery little breaths that mean she's getting horny.

I think back on all our chats together and our marathon texting and all the reasons to die young and not get old and fat and lazy and how sexy it will be to die the way we are planning to tonight. I think of all he people who will be shocked by finding our corpses in the conditions we will leave them in and I wonder if any of the other kids in school will think about doing what we are doing here in this basement tonight. Will they know that Zee, G-Dog, Daniel and Kevin can do for them what they are going to do for us? And my thoughts keep coming back to Laura and our sex talks and the things we shared and as Daniel fingers me and makes my nipples tingle and tighten, I grow excited but the fear remains ... it's like a little evil ferret inside my head and his name is PANIC and he's ready to pounce on me and shred any pleasure I might feel into bloody ribbons of pain.

Like Laura I am really feeling my arousal now and Daniel can tell because he whispers in my ear and asks if I'm ready. I don't answer because as soon as I hear the word "ready" my belly feels cold as ice.

"You can change your mind, Jackie." Daniel says, but it's the wrong thing to say to me right now. I look up into his eyes and see the love there, so I try to be gentle ...

"Daniel ..." I pause, not sure how to say it, "I need you to not do this WITH me. I need you to do this TO me.

"But you're so scared." he whispers.

"I need to be scared." I whisper back, "I need you to be in charge and I need it to hurt. And I need you to be a little cruel."

Daniel studies my face for a moment, then hugs me tight and kisses my ear. Then he lets me go and stands up.

"Get in position, Jackie." he says and I feel tingles run up and down my body, knowing we're about to start. And I obey and get on all fours on the brick platform. I hear the metallic scrape of the shaft as Daniel picks it up and hear the 'glugging' of the olive oil as he pours it onto the shaft.

I just have to be still and let it happen ... but I feel my anus clench tight as my fear escalates to terror.

"Wait. Please wait." I say to Daniel and I can hear my voice is quavering with a mixture of fear and arousal as I roll to one side and sit on my right hip, my hands flat on the floor. I look over at Laura's beautiful body ...

I suddenly feel so much love for Laura-May and want her so bad I ache to go to her. Or is that just me distracting myself again?

"You just have to start, Jackie." I hear Laura say softly, "Then ... then it will all just happen like it's supposed to."

I look up and my eyes meet Laura's and I realize that a big part of what I am feeling is the ecstasy kicking in ... I nod at her words and feel shame for cheating tonight by getting high. I give Laura a fake smile and get back up on all fours, lowering myself so my chest is on the bricks and my bum is high in the air. I take a deep breath and concentrate on relaxing my sphincter and because of the physical sensations of the ecstasy it cooperates and I feel it loosen. I am still very scared, but my body seems okay to begin and part of me wants to feel what Laura promised I would feel.

The ecstasy is confusing me ... I guess at least part of me wants to cum and die like we planned - hopefully cum more than once and have my last orgasm once I'm - Oh Jesus - totally penetrated ... totally impaled. I'm still scared, but ... that thought is now swimming through my mind and I feel a rush of sexual energy thinking about the spit going all the way through my body.

But I'm going to die.

I feel the cold rush start in my bum and flood upward through my core. I shudder, and lower my head, closing my eyes and resting my forehead on the brick floor. I think of what Laura said to me; I just have to start ...

"Okay." I whisper on impulse, and resettle my knees, opening my thighs a little and feeling the cheeks of my bottom open wider. I become aware that Daniel can now see my dimpled pink anus and that this is going to happen now and all I have to do is be still and let Daniel do the work, and ...

I feel the cold tip of the shaft touch the soft inner curve of my right bum cheek as Daniel tries to get it into position.

I just have to be still ...

And I gasp as I feel it centre on my anus. Daniel is very good as he aligns it and gently brings it to my anus, being very careful not to let the sharp tip scratch me. I know that only the first eight inches of the shaft is solid and the rest is a hollow pipe, but it still must be heavy and I feel such gratitude for Daniel to be so careful ...

And I feel the pressure and the tight ring of my anus is being opened by the tapered tip and I feel that sweet expansion and before I know it the shaft has me full open and is sliding inside me - I am amazed at how easy it moves inside me because of the olive oil. I lift my head and my mouth opens and Daniel pushes harder and I feel it penetrate deep ...

"Oh-h-h-h-h-h" I let out a quivery little moan as I feel my rectal valves pressed open wide and stretched as the shaft sinks inside me ... and it is SO inside me, filling my rectum. I can feel its coldness and its thickness and its weight in my lower gut - it is such a presence inside me now. It is HEAVY inside me. I feel my knees involuntarily slide together and my toes point inward and my body shudders and I feel the first BIG wave of sexual tension mixed with fear flood my abdomen. For the first time I am able to truly imagine what it will feel like to have this shaft pushed deep through my gut and if I live long enough to feel it slide up my throat and out of my mouth. I feel the first seeds of orgasm and try to be grateful that I chose this for myself for this night. I consciously relax my belly muscles and feel the slight sag.

From my left I hear Val gagging and know that she is now being throat-fucked by Kevin. I try to imagine what she is feeling but Daniel slides the shaft out of me a little then back in ...

"ohhhh." I gasp in a hoarse whisper, "fuck." and the words catch in my throat, "me." And he does - nice and slow, the shaft moving in and out of my bottom so smoothly. I lift myself up on my elbows and clasp my hands together and lower my head to hang down so my forehead is touching them and I keep my back arched so the angle is right. I have the brief thought that someone watching might think I am praying.

It feels so good - the presence of this thick and heavy penetration pressing down on my cunt and my g-spot from inside my rectum and I know now that this is going to be a very sexual experience. And Daniel is fucking me and every few strokes is pressing the shaft just a little deeper and soon I can feel the sharp tip scraping the top of my rectum where it curves to the left inside me and I know that Daniel will have to make sure it straightens that curve instead of ripping through it into my abdominal cavity or I will bleed out too quickly. It is both terrifying and exciting to know my life is in his hands.

I hear Laura's sharp intake of breath and open my eyes ... her mouth is open wide and she is gripping the sides of the bathtub so tight that her knuckles are turning white. Her eyes are squeezed shut and her face is scrunched in a grimace and I see that Zee is pushing his hunting knife into her belly just above her panties. And so it is beginning for Laura also and I wonder how well she will handle it.

Behind them I see that Cass has her pale thighs opened very wide and has her fingers hooked behind each knee and is gasping as G-Dog is pressing all four fingers and his thumb into her cunt. She too is grimacing even though she has the most sexual experience out of any of us. She was so eager that she didn't take off her top and I find this cute.

"Push! Pushhhh!" I hear her hiss and I watch as G-Dog leans into it and really pushes hard. When his hand goes in, it's like a 'thud' - his hand just breaks through the ring of her opening and lodges deep inside her and she grunts loudly and immediately drops her legs and squirms on the chair, twisting and gasping and panting, her eyes open wide, her fingers clawing at the arms of the chair, her toes curling. I hear the chair clunking and realize its legs are lopsided.

Then I gasp as I feel the shaft slide deep once more and the tip scrapes the deepest part of my rectum and I lean forward slightly to relieve that pressure.

"... please ... more lube ..." I say and realize that I've been panting. Daniel eases off and I feel the shaft changing angles inside me as he picks up the olive oil and soon I feel it run down the shaft and coat my bum and slither down over my sex and inner thighs. While Daniel is doing this, I lower my face so my chin is resting on the bricks and slide my hands under me and stroke my belly. I feel him set down the olive oil and move the shaft inside me.

I gasp softly as I feel him turn the shaft and I feel it twist my rectum to the left side and the tip presses up against that sphincter deep inside and I shudder as I feel this one start to open. The sensation is a new one and I cry out a little as I realize that it's this exact spot that my belly cramps when I have diarrhea. Now, with the shaft pressing through it, I feel that cramp but this time it is new and wonderful and frightening. The tip forces it open and Daniel twists the shaft and pushes then backs off, pushes and backs off ... he knows his anatomy as well as I do and knows what is going on inside me right now and slowly works it into me. I whimper as I feel the shaft finally ease that sphincter wide open and starts to slide into my large colon, straightening it out inside me.

"... oh gawd ..." I cry out and Daniel pushes more and I feel it sliding up the left side of my belly, deeper and deeper and deeper. And that feeling is so strong in me and I am torn between wanting more and more and more and the feeling that this hard steel shaft is sliding into my most delicate flesh. I run my hands over my belly and press in and I can feel the hardness inside me above my left hipbone and I realize as this feeling overtakes me that the ecstasy is now coming full on and that besides giving me a ton of energy, it is making me crave intimacy and the thing I am most intimate with right now is this shaft working inside my bowels. I also know that to make this work, Daniel is going to have to move the shaft inside me so it is midline - coming right up through the centre of my belly. He will have to shift my colon from its nested place running up the left side of my abdomen where it has lived all my life, and force it to the middle of my abdomen. And this will be something I haven't been able to imagine and I start shaking in anticipation. And in the meantime Daniel starts to fuck me again and the shaft pulling and pushing on that tight ring at the top of my rectum is making me feel aroused and fragile and vulnerable all at the same time. It hits me hard that this shaft will never leave my body while I am alive - it and I are locked together until I die. Oh dear God, I am afraid ... the large muscles in my thighs are shaking badly now.

"Oh-h-h!" I hear Laura's pained voice and open my eyes - Zee is pressing the knife deeper into her belly now. As the hinting of an orgasm builds inside me amidst my own fear, I watch her tummy tighten as the blade slowly sinks into her lower gut. Zee is angling it so he is pushing it straight down into her.

"Hnnng!" I hear her grunt and her belly tightens more and she twists in the tub, squirming, squeezing her eyes shut, the cords in her neck now standing out as the blade sinks deeper and deeper. She is crying out as she gasps, those wordless cries getting louder each time.

As I watch my friend be slowly stabbed deep in her gut, my own fingertips find the usually hollow spot above my pubic bone and discover that there is a firm lump there - it is my tightly packed vagina and uterus being pressed outward by the shaft and that all in turn is pressing hard on my swollen g-spot. The thought that this is near the spot Laura is feeling the blade is not lost on me as I press and massage there.

As I hear Laura cry out; "Oh FUCK!" and see that Zee is pressing the knife hilt deep inside her now and twisting it just a little bit, I feel my orgasm build and build inside me and I realize I am getting off on watching my friend be sexually tortured. But I let my guilt go, knowing that I too will die tonight so there will be no regrets afterward. I feel my belly tighten all on its own.

"... cumming ..." I whimper as a warning to Daniel and my body goes into sweet spasms. I rub my g-spot hard as I watch Laura tighten her belly while Zee starts to saw the knife in and out of her gut. I feel my own clear cum burbling out of my cunt to run down over my clit and drip onto the floor between my thighs.

"... oh Laura ..." I whimper but I know she doesn't hear me through her torment.

While I am still spasming inside, Daniel slides the shaft deep up my left side and holds it there and plays with the angle, loosening my bowels and making me feel like it is close to ripping me apart inside. I whimper and hear the weakness in my voice and I feel the shaft's angle change again.

It starts with feeling my anus pulled firmly toward the left side of my pelvic bone, my anus stretching and aching as he applies more and more pressure, levering the shaft. Deep inside on my left side I feel the tension building - my large colon resists, and I feel the shaft pulling it tight, my bum being moved, my belly both pulled and compressed. I widen my knees apart and brace myself and Daniel increases the pressure. It feels like my insides are being twisted in there and I cry out wordlessly, afraid that this isn't going to work, but sweet sweet Daniel doesn't give up ... the pressure builds and I feel a ripping sensation up the left side of my abdomen and my colon is suddenly loose and moving inside me.

"... mmmungghhhhh ..." I groan and strain and slap my hands flat on the bricks on either side of me as I feel the shaft dragging my large intestine across my belly to the centre line. I feel it pulling free of its home and feel my coils of small intestine moving and being pushed out of the way. I feel my anus tighten around the shaft, clinging to it - my body automatically trying to make it stop. My insides feel quivery and delicate and I am left sweaty and shaking and with a new fear that he may have torn my intestines by doing this. But I feel my bowel now in its new position and Daniel stops and holds the shaft still to let me come to grips with it. I force my anus to release its grip. After about a minute I can feel no change inside, and I know that if he had torn my bowels I would be able to feel the massive bleeding by now.

I lay my cheek down on the floor and explore my belly with my hands - I find a hollowness on my left side and there is a thickness in my middle now that runs straight up the centre of my abdomen - it is a ridge of tight flesh under the slack muscles of my belly that runs from just under my mound up past my belly button. I shudder and relax my belly once more, anticipating the next part. Again I feel the shaft change angles as Daniel picks up the olive oil and pours some right on my anus as he pulls the shaft partially out of me. Then I hear the bottle being put down and feel the shaft shake as he grips it tight. Now I feel it sliding slowly into me once more, but it goes deeper this time and straight up the middle of my gut. My thighs are shaking as I feel it sliding deeper and deeper and for one brief terrifying second I think he is going to go all the way right now. I can feel the pressure inside me rising as the tip slides about halfway between my belly button and my sternum - but before it goes further I feel a sharp bite and a resistance inside me and a pull in my rectum. Daniel applies pressure and holds it there and twists the shaft.

"Ahh!" I cry out as I feel the tip biting into my bowel high above my belly button and I realize what has happened - The shaft has straightened out a good length of my large intestine, but it has twisted and is looped back on itself so the shaft can't straighten it out any more.

Daniel slides it out of me until only the solid part is inside me, then pushes it back inside smoothly until he hits that resistance once more. Again I feel the bite and it makes my stomach quiver. Slowly out again, then back in deep.

"... oh gawd ..." I am feeling very sexual again as he repeats this over and over. He is fucking me with the shaft, deeper than is humanly possible without causing critical injury and I realize I am feeling what only a few people have ever experienced. My insides are starting to feel abused and loose and my thighs are weak and shaking. My entire body feels weak now - vulnerable and defenseless, and my breathing is long and deep and quivering. I also feel a quivering in my stomach and a tingling under my jaw like I might puke - the sensations of this invasion too much to handle. I feel the shaft change angle again, but this time it is not a small change - Daniel is lifting the end of the shaft and I feel the part inside me shifting down, pressing my bowel tight against my belly muscles, and prying my anus upward, pulling my cunt tight. I cry out at this - feeling my guts being stretched and abused. Daniel lowers the shaft then lifts it up firmly once more and I feel my knees come off the bricks and I am being lifted by the shaft lodged inside me. I almost pass out from this sensation - and maybe I do because I feel my knees hit the ground without feeling like he lowered me and I almost fall over and have to scramble my knees apart to steady myself

Then Daniel performs a brutally wicked magic ... he slides the shaft deep once more until it is pressed tight against that resistance and I can imagine my large intestine straight and stretched, the tip digging into the pink wall of my bowel. And he holds it there, keeping it firm and then gives the shaft a sharp slap. I gasp as I feel the bite - this time it is sharper and deeper. He does it again and my body jerks and I grunt - the sharp pain flaring high in my gut. And now he does it the third time and I feel the penetration as the tip tears a hole in my bowel opening it inside my stomach cavity.

I am groaning and almost fall to the side as my knees come together and my toes point inward and I wrap my arms around my belly, my face on the floor, my forehead and nose pressed tight on the bricks as I whimper. I feel a liquid fluttering inside my belly and know that it is blood flowing from my torn bowel. My mouth is watering as I endure this part of the impalement and I feel drool slipping from my open lips. I feel my stomach slowly convulse and I gag, but manage not to throw up. A sweet warmth is spreading through my abdomen and I can feel it swelling.

This is it - there is no turning back now.

I'm now dying - bleeding internally. Even an ambulance couldn't get me to the hospital before I bled out.

Daniel goes back to slowly fucking me with the shaft, drawing it out until only my rectum is filled, then sliding it back in deep ... the smoothness of the shaft sliding in and out of my anus is so invasive and so sexual and the pressure on my sex organs is immense. Despite my growing fear I can feel my second orgasm building.

I slide my hands over my belly and feel that it I am already starting to swell badly - I'm not sure if it is just the internal bleeding plumping my belly already or is also the tissue swelling from the abuse, but my gut feels tight inside and I can feel a firm bloating. I roll my head to the side away from the room and lay my fevered cheek on the cool floor. I am moaning as Daniel fucks me deep. I can feel the pressure build when the shaft is sliding into me and a sucking gurgling sensation as it pulls back.

Soon I feel my abdominal muscles start to tighten and the sweet feelings build fast in the tightly packed meat of my sex organs. As I start to cum, Daniel sees it and moves the shaft inside me, changing the up and down angles quickly, really working my gut as I cum. My body goes into spasms and I press in with my hands to prolong the orgasm. I feel my pelvis curling in spastic involuntary movements as I cum.

I hear Laura moan "oh gawd" and Zee reply "Good girl" and I turn to watch as a second wave of orgasmic pleasure rolls through my belly.

Sweet Laura is shaking badly, her breasts jiggling, her nipples tight and erect, her skin shiny and wet with sweat. Her black hair is plastered to her sweaty face, and I can smell the strong animal scent of her armpits from here. Her lower belly, inner thighs, and crotch are sopping with blood now and every now and then blood squirts from inside the gaping open wound in her lower belly. Laura is making sad little sounds deep in her throat ...

"nngh ... nngh ... nngh ... nngh ..." and her eyes are squeezed shut

Laura is holding her body rigid in the tub now, her body twisted toward Zee as though she is presenting herself to him - her arms and legs are braced against the sides of the tub, and her face is turned slightly away from me. I realize that she has lifted herself up from the bottom of the bathtub, her bum tight and quivering under her - I can see her thighs shaking. Her belly is pushed outward so she looks pregnant or really bloated and Zee is sawing away at her gut, halfway between her mound and her belly button. He is sawing the knife up and down, in and out in a slow steady rhythm - pulling it back until only the tip is inside her, then pushing it into her until the hilt presses tight against her skin - in and out ... in and out ... in and out. Zee is doing exactly what Laura told me she wanted and I hope it's working for her. She looks like she is enduring the pains of hell.

I want to watch more but the deep invasion of the spit inside me is keeping my sexual feelings and my pain alive. Daniel is fucking me with it now just like we talked about and I can feel the pressure building in my lower abdomen and my g-spot is starting to throb. I turn my head and lay my cheek back on the cool bricks and watch Laura being gutted as Daniel follows his own rhythm. I can feel the flow of liquid inside my bowels and guess that it is blood building up around the shaft. I let my weight rest on my upper chest and slide my hands down my flanks and over my lower belly. I feel a tingle of fear run up and down my sides as my hands find my entire belly now tight and swollen like a sausage.

I am bleeding badly inside and it is making my gut tight.

I try to let go of the fear and just concentrate on the sensations and I feel the tingling now in the muscles of my bum and the big muscles of my thighs. I know that I am building to another orgasm and I feel so thankful for that.

Daniel is sliding the shaft in and out of me so forcefully now and my thighs start to shake and my anus clenches tight on the shaft, dragging on it as it slides in and out of me. I feel my sexual tension build crazy-fast and I am reaching that edge that will tip me over into a third orgasm.

"... cumming ..." I gasp as I feel my cunt cramping and right on cue Daniel jerks the shaft just that little bit deeper and I feel it break through my large bowel and deep into my stomach cavity.

And that does it so perfectly.

I squeeze my eyes shut and cum hard - my entire body going into convulsions as he slides the shaft deeper still. I can feel it as a cold hard presence, making my body rigid from my crotch almost to my sternum. I hear someone puking hard [Val?] and Laura panting out her pain. And as my orgasm still hums inside me, Daniel pushes the spit deeper and I feel the tip bite the outside of my stomach sac. I gag hard and my body jerks and I think that Daniel will pull back and let me come to grips with this before he does it, but instead he increases the pressure and I feel my stomach being compressed and dimpled and pushed upward - a strong dull pressure and at it's centre a sharp bite of pain.

I get the palms of my hands under me and try pushing myself up on all fours, but I can only manage half way. My arms are shaking and I am feeling my stomach heaving and clenching as Daniel applies more and more pressure. I feel liquid in the back of my throat and I can taste bananas.

"Mmmrrph" I finally manage a sound, but it is hurting bad now and I am quivering.

I open my mouth to yell for him to stop, but my throat is locked up in a spasm. I swallow hard, trying to make it stop but I can't. Daniel is going to finish the impaling now no matter what and I am feeling a growing terror.

I am gagging harder and continuously now, working the root of my tongue to make it stop. I lift my left hand and slap it down hard on the bricks, trying to signal for him to stop - to give me a break - to let me rest before the end but he keeps the pressure up.

I feel the sharp bite in my gut and that now familiar rending feeling as the tip widens the hole it has made and I can feel the weight of the tip sliding inside my stomach - and now I can taste bananas and blood. I feel the shaft move sharply inside me and realize Daniel is readjusting his grip. I feel my stomach rapidly filling with blood and it is growing painfully tight with it and Daniel keeps the shaft moving inside me, exciting my insides. I try not to, but I can't help it - my mouth fills with drool and the underside of my jaw tingles wildly and my mouth opens on its own - "... glurrphh ... " - as I puke hard and blood gushes up my throat to splatter on the floor in front of me. The taste of blood and banana is strong. My stomach is swelling rapidly again and I lower my head and - "... mmphhh ... " - puke blood all over the floor between my hands. Now my throat unlocks and I draw deep breaths for as long as I can.

My stomach loosens somewhat and I feel Daniel pushing the shaft gently deeper and I realize what he is doing - he is probing, trying to align the shaft with my gullet so he can take me all the way with this. I am truly terrified now because my greatest fear is that he will miss and push the shaft up into one of my lungs. So I make slight adjustments to my body position as he inches the shaft deeper and I feel the odd sensation of it nesting in the top opening of my stomach and the bottom of my gullet. I gag again lightly. Then - because I don't want to lose the position - I steel myself and ...

"... push now ..." I whimper and Daniel pushes firmly and steadily.

I feel the shaft sliding up my throat and it scares me badly so I push up with my arms so I am as upright as I can get. I feel the shaft pull on my gullet before Daniel adjusts to the new angle. The sensation is so foreign and so frightening - to feel something solid and invasive forcing my gullet wider and filling it from deep inside me. I draw my last deep breath through my nose as I feel the shaft rising and suddenly it is high in my throat and I instinctively start to swallow hard and fast to try to push it back down, but my throat is expanding - stretching - and I am working my tongue and the shaft's thickness is there pressing down the root of my tongue and I clench my jaw but - oh sweet Jesus - it is in my mouth now and forcing my jaw apart and I feel and hear it hit my teeth and it is forcing my mouth open and my jaw quivers and my teeth chatter on it and I watch it slide out of me about a foot and stop. My throat tightens around the shaft with a steady quivering gagging sensation, and my teeth chatter on the shaft.

I am going to die now and I feel such terror and sorrow and I feel a soul-crushing hopelessness. The shaft is through me and I am so aware of it holding my body rigid. My eyes flicker across the room and see that Val is lying facedown in a pool of her own blood and vomit, her body twitching, her clothes a wet mess, Kevin, Zee, G-Dog, Cass and even Laura are all staring at me. Then I feel Daniel's gentle hands ease me to my side and lay me down carefully on the bricks.

I feel like squirming because of the sensations inside me but can't because of the rigidity of the steel in my body. I stare at the end of the shaft as I lay there and I can feel the shaft sticking out of my bum and it slithers between my thighs as I slowly stretch my legs out. I wrap my legs around it, crossing my ankles and I trap it there and the feeling is so sensual because when I flex my thigh muscles I feel it move inside me. I become aware of so much as I lay dying - my anus loosens and blood pulses from it in time with my struggling heart and it slides down my thigh and puddles under me. My stomach is growing tight with blood once more and I feel it start to quiver around the shaft.

My body is doing some odd things now - I feel my belly spasm and blood jets up my throat and my cheeks plump and it spurts past the seal of my lips on the shaft and out my nose. I can feel my intestines squirming inside me around the shaft. I feel my bladder release and the warm pee burbles between my thighs. My belly spasms again and again the blood rushes up my throat and my cheeks plump and it spurts from my mouth and nose. Then a third time. And a fourth. I am marveling at the sensations inside my body as it gets down to dying - rolling waves of tingles and warmth moving through my body - muscles loosening then tightening all on their own.

The room is tilting at an odd angle and I feel my toes and fingers tingling.

"... urrgggllll ..." I hear Laura make a loud wet sound and watch as Zee saws his knife in and out of her to finish opening her belly. I watch my friend as she gets closer to death and I see that her face is loose and expressionless as Zee finishes cutting and when he stops he just holds the knife there and her eyelids droop and her mouth opens and her lips are slack and I think she has died. But Zee angles his knife and pushes it deeper and I see a grimace flicker across her brow and her face goes slack again, her eyes staring straight ahead. Again I think she is dead but after a few seconds she closes her eyes and it looks like she is going to say something. Opening her eyes she looks up at Zee and I have trouble hearing her but I think she says "oh Zee". Then her eyes again lose focus and she gets a glazed, faraway look - a hopeless look: She knows she is dying fast. Then her chin quivers and her lower lip curls and she too pukes a gout of blood all over her chin and chest.

My own belly spasms weakly again but no blood comes up. And I become aware that the tingling is creeping up my legs and arms. The room is starting to rotate and I am feeling dizzy now an a little sick.

But it's not so bad, dying. Not at all like I thought it would be. It's peaceful and calming. I watch Laura turn her head and puke another gush of blood onto herself, her eyes dulling and her expression slack as she - like me - just lays there and feels herself dying. I suspect she is savouring these final sensations like I am - savouring the foreign feelings ... For her; having her belly opened from crotch to sternum. For me; to feel this shaft penetrate me like nothing ever has - fucked by steel and given orgasms on the way to death as I lay in a puddle of my blood and vomit. What a mess we have made - a mess others will discover and puzzle over.

But Laura and I are dying together, awash in blood, and that is what we wanted.