Posted by rache on July 02, 2008 at 20:23:43:
1179 words on friendship
by rache
Copyright 2008 Rachael Ross all rights reserved
This story contains: Allegations of sex, incest, organized crime, abortion, murder, love, and friendship
Synopsis: Childhood friends Jennifer and Susan reminisce about old times after a long absence.
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1179 words on friendship
by rache
The sun was going down the way it had so many times before, and we were watching it one last time.
"I always liked it out here," Susan said, splashing the water with her bare feet. "Remember when we were sixteen? We came up here with those two guys…"
"Jeff and Craig, yeah."
I lit a cigarette, leaning against one of the big wooden poles that held the dock up. It was jutting ten feet out of the water, all graying and half eaten away in places. Just beneath the surface of the lake I could see algae growing like green hair, undulating slowly with the current.
"Yeah," she nodded. "Which one did I fuck?"
"I dunno," I shrugged. "Jeff fucked me, I know that."
"Must have been Craig then," Susan kicked a little harder and a fish jumped some twenty feet away.
"I never liked him," I said. "He always reminded me of that guy in seventh grade, the one who used to pull my hair. Remember him?"
"Oh God!" Susan laughed. "What was his name?"
"He'd say 'Ding-Dong…Avon Calling' and laugh," I sighed. "I hated that."
"Yeah, you were gonna change your name," Susan said. "Soon as you turned eighteen."
"I did," I laughed a little unhappily.
"Don't blame me for marrying the guy," Susan turned her head to look at me. "That was your fault."
"Yeah, but you introduced us," I pointed my cigarette at her.
"Didn't mean I wanted you to have his babies," she giggled, tossing her blonde hair into the wind.
"Thank God I didn't," I said and we thought about that for awhile. "You ever have kids?"
"Me?" Susan asked. "Almost. Someplace down in Mexico. Texalazhata or something like that."
"Heh," I grinned at her.
"Six months premature, as they say," Susan made a little face. "It sucked."
"Yeah," I nodded. "Boy or a girl?"
"I don't know," she waved a hand. "Wasn't like it mattered."
"It woulda mattered to me, I think." I flicked my cigarette away. "I'd have to know what I was killing."
"Well, that's the difference between me and you then," Susan said a little sadly.
"Maybe," I was feeling sad too and we just watched the water for a minute or two.
It was warm and springtime and the sky was blue with streaks of white like God had dragged his fingers high over the earth. Long ghostly shadows stretching from one horizon to the other and the sun was going down behind them. Going down on all of us.
"Hey, I never told you…" Susan said abruptly and I hadn't really taken my eyes off of her.
"What?"
"I sorta fucked your brother," she said.
"When?"
"At your wedding," Susan sucked her lips. "I wasn't gonna tell you. He made me promise, but since…"
"You fucked him on my wedding day?" I stared at her and Susan just shrugged.
"I didn't mean to," she said. "It just kinda happened, you know?"
I took a deep breath, holding it for a second and letting it go slowly.
"You're pissed, aren't you?" Susan frowned. "I'm sorry."
"Yeah, well," I swallowed hard. "That was a long time ago."
"I knew you loved him, but I figured you were marrying that other guy, so…" Susan was feeling the need to explain the way guilty people do.
"He never told me," I said with a little snort. "That fucker."
"He loved you too," Susan said quickly. "We didn't plan it, I swear. He was a little drunk and well, you were marrying someone else, you know?"
"Yeah, but he shoulda known I wasn't gonna…Ah fuck it," I caught myself. "It doesn't matter."
"I'm sorry," Susan repeated.
"Yeah, I know," I said. "Thanks."
"For what?" Susan asked.
"For telling me," I said. "Most people wouldn't, or at least…"
"They wouldn't feel bad about it?" Susan smiled and I nodded.
"Yeah," I said. "I wouldn't feel bad if I was you."
"Well," Susan shrugged. "Maybe that's the difference between us."
"Yeah," I had to smile at that. "That one too, huh?"
"Didn't know we were so different," Susan said.
"We didn't used to be," I said and we were both thinking about that.
"Ten years is a long time," Susan said. "Maybe we just never noticed."
"Maybe."
Susan looked around and the place was empty. It had been so busy when we were kids, full of people all summer long. Noisy with laughter and loud voices and people enjoying life. Now it was quiet, the only sounds coming from the wind in the trees and the creaking of the dock, and the gentle lap of water around Susan's legs and the wormy wood beneath us.
"The sun's going down," she said without looking at me.
"It always does."
"So?" Susan nodded to herself and then looked at me. "Are we gonna do this thing, or not?"
"Yeah," I agreed. "But you know I have to ask…Where is it?"
"I don't know," Susan shrugged apologetically. "I spent it. Lost it. You know."
"Don't make me do this."
"I don't have it," Susan was looking at me, her blue eyes staring into mine, but they lied. I'd known her my whole life.
"Who are you protecting?" I asked her and she was pushing hard, going to the limit for someone.
"Nobody," she whispered and we just stared at each other, with that nine millimeter pressed against my tummy, tap-tap-tapping like a heartbeat cause it helped me think.
"I'll find out, Susan," I warned her. "Make it easy. All they want is their money back."
"And me, right?" she gave me a wry smile. "You frown when you lie, Jen."
"Maybe I'm frowning because I love you."
"Same thing," Susan shrugged.
"I don't think so."
"Then let the money go," she was turning around, lifting her feet out of the water so she could face me.
"Susan…" tap-tap-tapping and I shook my head.
She stood up slowly, smiling at my frown and spread her arms.
"Tell them I spent it," she said. "It's not a real lie."
"Spent it down in Mexico?" I asked and Susan's smile was going away. "You're just like me, Susan. You'd have to know what it was."
"No," she shook her head.
"The real difference between us…"
"Jen…"
"…You couldn't kill it. You kept the baby didn't you?" I asked, knowing all of it suddenly. "That makes it, what? Nine? Ten years old now?"
"Jennifer, please…"
"Nine," I decided, doing the math in my head and it all made sense.
"…Don't."
"Boy or a girl, Susan?" I was pointing the gun at her stomach, flat and empty now, but it hadn't always been and we both knew it.
"Boy," she whispered and I looked at her for a long while.
"I guess you really did spend it all, huh?" I decided finally and the fear fell out of her lungs with a deep sigh.
"Thank you," Susan looked away to where the sun was going down and we watched it together one last time.
end
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