Posted by jamie on May 05, 2002 at 22:25:28:
PART 5
14th August 4986 (7.00am)
Fingers are touching my face as I awaken. It is nice and I think I am still at home and it is my mother. She often woke me up that way, touching my cheek - brushing my hair away from my face. Then I open my eyes and there is a strange pretty young lady sitting on my bed caressing my face. She is smiling. 'Easy now, ' she says gently. 'It is time to get up sweet heart. My name is Jenny and I am going to make you into the most beautiful girl ever to leave us.'
Then it hit me. The tingling started between my legs and ate deep into my belly. I knew at once it was a most awful terror that was doing it. Today I was going to die. They were here to get me ready, make me lovely just so a man could kill me.
'No' I hear my voice say. I think it is my voice, but I have never heard it wail so terribly. I shrink away from the pretty lady.
'You must be calm now, Liena,' says another voice. It is the matron. 'Get up now, please dear. The more you keep yourself busy until you are with your client the easier it will be for you to get through this difficult time. Once you are with your client it won't be so bad.'
'Yes, and also I have another seventeen authorisations to see to before seven thirty' says another voice. 'So bring her to me first if you will, Jenny, and I then I can will leave her to you.'
I look in confusion about the room then see a hard looking woman standing there with a thing that looks like a camera in her hands.
Other hands ease me out of bed. I am naked.
'Liena, dear,' says Jenny indicating the third woman, 'Ursula is with the Governor's Office and she has to do your final clearance and obtain formal authorisation for you to be culled this morning.'
'Just look into the lens, at the red light, child,' she says coldly to me.
I do so and it turns green.
She just sort of grunts at it and then says that I am now duly authorised to be taken and given over to the use of a citizen who has paid the appropriate fee for the rights to my life and that he is in turn authorised to use such means as are lawful to process me according to the code of practice set down by the Committee for Prevention of Excessive Suffering by Selected Girls and do I have any objection to this determination.
I do not answer. I am frozen.
'She has to have an audible reply, honey,' I heard Jenny say.
'Please don't take me out there to that man. I do not want to die, oh please', I say helplessly.
'Look girl, I am late already, so tell me, do you or do you not agree you can lawfully be culled,' the other harsh voice says.
'Yes.' I have said it, said they can kill me. The wave of terror sweeps over me. down my body again.
'Now, girls' she continues at me, 'we have a couple of other small administrative matters which have to be cleared up. First your letter to your next of kin. Have you signed one yet?' Do you want your body sent back to your people
I am confused. I tell her I don't know anything about a letter.
'They are in your dresser draw, girl,' she says irritably. 'They are all the same. They tell your folks that they should not worry about you and that sort of thing. They say you know your duty to the Venerable Leader and the Federation and willingly give your life to the betterment of society. The letter says you are going to be processed painlessly and so on. You should have been told all this stuff ages ago.'
I look at a letter.
'I am not going to be killed painlessly though. My client smothers or strangles his girls,' I say, tears coming again.
'They don't know that, you silly girl, so sign it and let me get on with my work.'
I sign a letter.
The horrible woman leaves us saying something about how us girls are not being trained properly these days and how anyone would think I am the only girl going to be killed today.
The Matron gives me two tablets to take. She says one is to help me with my fear a little, suppress the urge to panic and try something bad like resist my client . She is sorry she is not allowed to give me anything for the pain I must suffer. Girls must be natural as they are processed, she says. The other one is to keep me nice and pleasant for my client as I die.
'Do you know how he wishes you to be prepared. Honey?' It is Jenny speaking again. I have taken the tablets and Matron has gone. She had squeezed me on the shoulder and told me to be brave and it would soon be all over.
A young boy has come into the room. He is only wearing a pair of briefs. His job is to come into the shower with chosen girls and make sure that they are properly bathed and fresh for their deaths.
'Sorry?' I stammer to Jenny.
'I seem to have misplaced the order for your preparation and was wondering if you knew how your client wanted you prepared for him.'
'No, Richard did not tell me that.'
'Do you know how he wants to kill you, perhaps?'
I find I can answer Jenny as she is nice and kind to me.
'Richard said my client would make up his mind when he saw me again in the morning - this morning in the processing studio. Richard thought he often smothered his girls and sometimes he strangled them if he wanted them to suffer a bit more before they die. He does that if he is having troubles at his work.'
'Lennie,' Jenny was talking to the boy, 'you tell us what you think Liena's client might do. We have found' she is looking at me now, 'that most clients who make up their mind when they see their girl do so on her appearance. Oh by the way, Lennie is a trainee in the preparation department. I hope you don't mind if we discuss what needs to be done to you. He must learn, after all.'
'Let me see' Lennie is saying as he looks at me, tilting my head back to see my face better. 'Hmm, if we were to cut her hair real short he will no doubt be utterly captivated by her lovely neck. Nothing like clearing the hair away to give a lovely long neck a compelling line, I always say.'
'Yes', Jenny comes to me as she speaks, her hand going to my hair, touching it, feeling it, 'but if we leave her hair long and clean and shiny to form a gorgeous dark curtain under her head as she lays down, don't you think he might want to enjoy smothering her every bit as much?'
'True, but we can compromise, indeed we should as we do not know by which method he will want to kill her. Suppose we put her hair up in a formal style. That way her neck will be beautifully bared for him if he chooses to strangle her yet he can tell her to let it down if that is the way he wants her.'
'I don't know,' says Jenny. 'She has such fine hair and it is likely to become untidy if she is strangled. You know how a girl always struggles when the pain gets bad. Also I do not need any more complaints from clients who hate the feel of stray strands between their hands and their girl's necks.'
It seems impossible, but I am starting to calm down a little, I realise. Perhaps if I can just let them do what they have to with me I may be able to stop from letting the terrible panic take me over. Perhaps it is the way they handle me as they prepare me for my client or perhaps the pill I have taken is helping a little.
My fingers are still shaking though.
'We must make a guess at it then, I suppose', the boy is saying.
'How would you kill her if she was yours, then Lennie?'
Lennie comes to me and touches my face. He is so gentle. His fingers run over my cheeks then over my lips. He tilts my head back and looks at my neck, touches it with the tips of his long gentle fingers, pressing very softly in the centre. It feels nice until I realise why he is doing it - to work out how he would like to kill me if I were his.
'Well, it would be a crime to waste such a classically beautiful neck. Her throat is soft yet the fine structures beneath would provide a lovely sensuous feel under thumbs as they pressed into it, a perfect example for the purpose of manual strangulation if one is to use the parameters set down in the qualities classification manual.'
'That's decided then,' Jenny says. 'We shall cut her hair short for manual strangulation.'
'What about the places on her which he will want to use to kill her then'. This is Jenny speaking, educating the boy in his job, I realise. She is using me to teach him all about how to prepare girls for their client.
''Well, we should still prepare her face for hand smothering, especially her lips and under her nose. Some nice rich moisturiser for her face and lips to make it easy for him to prevent any air from being taken by her unless he wishes to keep her alive a little longer. And her neck, of course. A generous application of the new high penetration flesh conditioner to the throat area will make her neck feel soft and pliable where the thumbs would press if he does, as I expect, want to strangle her.'
Jenny goes to the door after telling Lennie to complete my preparation as discussed then she stop and tells him to make sure I am given a long cool down spray after my cleaning and to remember that I will get very hot as I am being killed by asphyxiation so he is to use a generous application of skin coolant so I remain nice to touch right to the end.
I hear this yet do not feel too frightened. That is strange.
I am seated at a mirror looking at my hair fall away. Looking at my neck as it is bared for the man's hands. I hate my neck. I hope the man will smother me after all. The boy is good at cutting hair.
Lennie is not naked in the shower but I can see he is aroused. His hands feel soothing on me as he massages me with the cleansing lotion. He uses his finger tips a lot to clean my skin, being very gentle, especially with my face and neck. He says he must not leave any marks on me to spoil my skin.
The rinsing spray is so cold. Lennie rubs me quickly to stop goose bumps forming he says. The cold air used to dry me makes me shiver. Lennie sprays me with some mist. He says this is the stuff to keep my skin cool and dry to feel as I am being killed by loss of air.
Lennie then smooths some moisturisers into my lips and face around my mouth. He says I have lovely lips and it would be a shame to have them covered as I die. He says girl's lips show what is happening to her as she dies from asphyxiation and hand smothering is a waste of them.
I think he likes to work with girls who are about to be killed.
He covers my lips and under my nose very gently with his hand and tells me to try to breath in. I cannot and he says good and lets me go. He says my lips do feel nice, though.
He uses another thinner cream and smooths it into my neck, being very gentle not to hurt me as he works it into my throat area with his thumbs. He is breathing quickly. I now know he would love to have me to strangle.
Lennie has finished making me up, just a little, he said, to make my skin look very young and fresh.
Jennie comes back then and tells me to stand and looks at me closely all over. She tells Lennie that I will do and takes me to the door and faces me up the passage and tells me to go to Studio 9(g) and to try to be very brave and to remember that it is my duty to the State to present myself beautifully for my client's pleasure and she hopes it will not be too bad for me as she thinks I am a nice girl.