This is so cool. Sam, can this discussion be archived somehow?

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: Gender (m/f): : Male : : Sexual orientation (straight, gay, bi, impossible to say, etc.): : Completely heterosexual, unless I am unbelievably repressed. : : Age (approximate if you wish): : 46 : : At what age did you start having snuff fantasies?: : 11 or 12. They were vague at first, but became much more highly developed later. : : About what percentage of your sexual fantasies are snuff-oriented?: : Maybe 60 or 70%. I have other fantasies having to do with taboo themes such as underage partners and incest. : : In your fantasies, do you usually see yourself as the killer or the victim? : It took me a while to figure this out, but the weird thing is that while I am male, I identify in my fantasies with the feelings of the female victim. I am rarely present in the fantasy as myself. I have never fantasized being a male victim, and find fantasizing myself as the killer to be a turnoff. : In many of my fantasies the killer or killers are faceless. In others, death is self-inflicted, so the killer and victim are the same. : : In your fantasies, does the killer generally fuck the victim (willingly or otherwise)?: : Sometimes, sometimes not. If so, the victim cooperates eagerly. : : Torture the victim?: : Never. My victims always die with as little pain and as much pleasure as possible. : : What types of death turn you on?: : Neither instantaneous nor lingering. Death takes long enough for the victim to know that she is dying, but is over soon. Usually the victim is dispatched with a knife or arrows. She is always nude or semi-nude. She may be wounded in the breast or in the belly or both; she may die from stabbing to the genitals, but only if self-inflicted. If shot with arrows there may be only one or there may be several. Strangulation occasionally, if during sex. When I was much younger I sometimes imagined the victim burned at the stake or jumping off a cliff, but these have lost their appeal over the years. : A strong element in my fantasies is that of ceremonial sacrifice from religious motivation. In these fantasies the victim is an eager participant, often having competed with other eager candidates for the honor of being chosen to be sacrificed. In some cases her immolation takes place through sexual intercourse with a supernatural being. In these cases her death results from the intensity of the orgasm she experiences; although she may suffer physical injury in the process, this is not a significant factor in her death. These fantasies often feature a group of girls giving themselves one by one as the remaining ones look on, hoping they will be next. : I read once about practices in ancient societies whereby living rulers sent requests for advice or other messages to revered ancestors by sending couriers into the afterlife, by killing them. In one type of fantasy a beautiful young woman begs to be allowed to perform this vital service, knowing that she will reside forever in heaven with the revered ancestor. She is shot to death with arrows, and the answer to the question she carried is read by shamans in the position of her body as it falls. : A similar legend I read spoke of a ceremony held on the anniversary of the death of a great ruler. Gifts and sacrifices were made to the departed great one, who has now become a god, including that of fresh new young wives. In my fantasy girls compete eagerly to be chosen for this honor, knowing that it will allow them to live as wives of a god, forever young, beautiful and immortal in heaven. They embrace their sacrifice as a triumph. Families of the girls sacrificed are considered to be related to a god. Girls passed over for the sacrifice try to burst in to the ceremony and kill themselves with the sacred blade, as it is known that if they succeed, they will go to heaven with the others. Sometimes, despite all precautions, they succeed… : What killers' motivations generally turn up in your fantasies?: : I hardly think of the killers in my fantasies. My focus is all on the victims. Sometimes they are carrying out a religious duty. Occasionally they are lustful. In the case of supernatural agents, they may subsist on the life energy of the victims they consume. : : What's the attitude of the victim? Horrified? Aroused? Willing?: : Always willing. Usually eager. Nothing happens in my fantasies that the girl has not signed up for. : : What details of other people's snuff fantasies turn you off?: : Gross mutilation, such as beheading or severing of breasts or limbs. Disembowelling. Detailed descriptions of organs and body fluids. I like a beautiful corpse. Dolcett’s strikingly attractive style aside, cannibalism strikes me as icky. The spitting idea is intriguing, though. : Any hint of hostility or rage toward the victim turns me off. The victim is holy, for me. Although my victims often die of self-inflicted wounds they are never suicidal in the sense of being depressed or tired of life. There motivation is always positive (in a weird way). : How have your fantasies effected your real sex life? Has it broken up relationships? Have you ever had a lover who shared your fantasies?: : I have shared fantasies with some partners, and acted out bondage-related role-playing with a number of girls, but I have never shared my snuff fantasies, even when I suspected my partner might be receptive to them. However I enjoy my fantasies privately every time I have sex with my pretty young wife. : : How closely do you guard the secret that you have these fantasies?: : Very. I have never shared my fantasies except on this very board, and cannot imagine that I ever will. It took my some time to come to terms with them privately, as I am in life a very gentle person. I accept my fantasy life now for what it is, but draw a firm line at sharing it. : I also know from sharing other fantasies that the fantasy sometimes has less power for me when it is no longer private.