The worst 'worst' story should indeed get special mention & I might add, at least in that category, I feel I am out of the running.....if I may be so bold as to say so....Kojy
Cut the trying to influence the judges crap! They know what the worst of the worst is. Planting thoughts in their minds won't change a thing.
My twenty year old daughter, however, does agree 100% with your assessment. You didn't write the worst worst story. You are in the running for best worst story, but she truly believe that I penned the winner of the best worst story. Little Nellie, who only has a few sad and pathetic months to live after a bankrupting twenty year struggle with a fatal illness, is beside herself with joy thinking she'll finally get a chance to be a member of Erotic Horror. Did I tell you that five years ago she asked Make A Wish for a membership and they turned her down? She still sobs from that cruel heartbreak.
Oh, I'm just rambling and you're not interested anyway.
Good luck to you, Kojack.
Crew
Ah, you made Little Nellie giggle. You're a saint! It's the first time she's giggled in twelve years! She just said between between desperate rasping gasps for air, "Thanks, Kolchak."
It's not for me that I do this, ...Kojak, it's for my dying daughter, Little Nellie. Did I tell you that she lives in a bubble? Yes, it's true, she's a bubble girl with absolutely no resistance to disease. Maybe you saw her last summer in that Playboy pictorial "The Dying Bubble Girls of Southern California." She didn't want to do it, but it was the only way to get the money to keep her bubble inflated.
I'm rambling again.
Crew
You are a cruel and heartless human being, Kolchakk. Winning this contest is apparently more important to you than making the last few weeks of a tortured young woman's two decade life of misery at least bearable.
Splay, I have a $1.93 that I have saved for Little Nellie's funeral. It was for a ribbon to wrap around the sturdy cardboard box that is her casket. Would that be sufficient to buy your vote?
Crew
Yes, Kojjak, a simple sturdy cardboard coffin. This box has particularly attractive printing of the words 'this side up' on all four sides and Little Nellie likes it.
She looks forward to meeting Mr. Savalas, but thinks you're kidding her.
Little Nellie won't last a month or two if I don't win that membership to Erotic Horror. For the past week all she has done is practice her bellybutt poses alone in her plastic bubble. If I don't win I know that Little Nellie is going to trade that plastic bubble for a cardboard coffin that reads 'this side up' on all four sides really quick. There is a slim chance that I don't win.
Better send the twine via Fedex and and do it next day air, K O J A K.
Crew