Posted by Crew on September 25, 2004 at 18:43:52:
In the castle was a room forever dark. No flamed torches illuminated its cold stone walls. No openings granted the sun admittance. At night it was even darker. Under the fullest of cloudless moons the room was so black the Devil himself dared not enter. Its only tenant was the Lord named Death.
One night massive clouds of furious power smothered the moon while privileged nobles selected the fairest lady in their domain, stripped her of all clothing and stood her before the thick oak door of that room. She was their offering to the Lord Death. The plague's cure, they cackled, knowing it was true. They had forfeited other beauties and the grateful Lord Death had magically spared them the plague's fatal touch. Now the lethal sickness had returned, collecting its tolls from luckless thousands and threatening the wealthy nobles. It was time they tendered the Lord Death his bounty that he would once more trick the plague and spare them their pitiless lives. They knew his price and they knew he awaited his bonanza within the four cold walls of the black room. That night they chose ransom's coin to be Sue Anderson, a woman I worked with and always wanted to boink while she played dead. A good choice if I do say! How lucky can I get?
So, the Lord Death killed her with a kiss. Then he boinked her her. She flopped around a lot while being boinked. Good stuff.
The Lord Death was very satisfied with the fine boink he just enjoyed and spared the nobles' lives.
One good boink deserves another, he figured.
What a guy! A real boinking humanitarian and a Democrat.