The Picnic

Posted by Barbanne on January 20, 2004 at 23:03:33:


I wake up slowly, you know how it is, one moment I am sort of dreaming and the next I am sort of awake. I feel fantastically rested and relaxed and like a cat coming too, I stretch, and then tense and relax my body and feel just super.
I look at Alex beside me. He is so beautiful and when he is asleep like this he looks so peaceful and yummy that I could eat him right up.
But he needs to sleep. That’s because I spent half of last night eating him right up and the poor darling is worn out. Now I think of it I am pretty sore down there from a bit of youthful exuberance myself. How many times did he have me last night. Not enough fingers Barb, and that means it is beyond your maths capabilities.

I slip out from under the sheet. Naked. Of course. That’s the way I sleep with my man, Alex. And at this time of year it’s really warm and naked is good. I go to the kitchen and start getting some breakfast ready, Alex needs building up as I have plans for his day that are going to require him to have stamina. Lots of stamina. Weeties, fresh melons, tea and maybe some toast to follow.
Today we are going on a picnic and I want to start getting that ready too. I get down my hamper and put in the plates, the knives, forks and spoons, mugs to drink from, teatowels and condiments. Standing by the sink, bare assed naked, I prepare salad and pack it in containers, some cold chicken and some hard boiled eggs (should make farting easy for afters.) I pop this back in the fridge and decide to wake up old sleepy head.
I traipse up the passage in the nude and lo and behold he is still stacking up the zee’s. I slip back under the sheet and wriggle on over until I am behind him, my tits pressed against his back and my groin shoved against his lovely tight ass. I put my little hand over his back and rub my fingers ever so lightly against his tum, down to his groin and there is my favourite friend and oh, he is all slack and sleeping.
But what’s this.......he IS waking up, standing up to greet me...........oh goody!!
Then suddenly Alex grabs my arm and, the bugger, he’s been playing possum all along. Whuuups, ooooh, yike, next thing I know I’m on my back again and Alex is leaning over me and my friend is growing bigger by the moment and whoopee, except I wish I wasn’t quite so sore from last night.
But what’s this evil looking grin on Alex’s face?
Oh no...........”Alexxxxx!, don’t!”
“Not the tickling.”
His grin turns to triumph and the next thing we’re rolling around in the bed while the bugger tickles me unmercifully.
And hell, am I ticklish. Well, I don’t know what the neighbours think, I’m whooping and giggling and laughing and screaming out “No, no...........Alex, stop it,, shit help, more................oh Alex.” All amidst uncontrollable giggling and laughing and shrieking.
Well, this goes on for a bit and our reputation is shot.....I mean buggered.
Then he slows down and coming down on me, he starts kissing me and I’m a gone goose if I let this go on for another moment. I mean I love the guy so much he can have what he wants and do what he likes to me.
But no, not today. Today is picnic day.
“Alex, get yourself ready. We’re going out.”
“Oh c’mon Barb, won’t be but a minute.”
“Shoulda thought of that before you started tickling...cruel man.”
“Mmmmmnnnnnnnn, you don’t mean that.” He’s got me by the boobies and he’s weakening my resolve.
“Bugger it, I do.” Up I hop, trying to look dignified while stark bloody naked.
“Oh well........................”
He looks so little boy hurt, that I go to water and my tum churns with love.
But I’m determined.
“C’mon Alex, it’s picnic day. Up and at ‘em”

He grumbles and mutters and generally carries on like a frustrated male and I skip off to get myself ready for our outing. We have a secluded little cove on the coast where a stream drains into the ocean and its about a half hour’s drive from home and its like our spot. I pull on the bottom of my red bikini. It’s a nylon lycra mix and consists of a couple of side strings that hang on my hips and a triangle that covers my front playground and another triangle that covers the crack of my ass while allowing the globes of my buttocks to hang free. I know I look sexy in it and I love to look that way for Alex. I toss the matching bra top into my beach bag along with my towel and sunnies and cream and make up and stuff. I put on a towelling top that zips right up the front. I zip it to about three quarters of the way. I have decided to keep myself ready for action as this is, after all, a necrobabe/necrobloke picnic and I am sure we are going to end up having fun. I slip my feet into flip flops, apply a little war paint and I’m ready to go.
I get my food from the fridge and put it in the cool box with a cooler brick and take that and the hamper out to the wagon where I deposit it in the back along with my beach bag.
Alex appears and he looks fabulous as usual. He is dressed in a beautiful dark blue knit shirt and white tailored shorts and sandals and has big wrap around sunnies on. I think he looks good enough to eat, but then I think that all the time.
He gets behind the wheel and I slide into the passenger seat and we’re off.

Knowing it will take us about a half hour’s drive, I have decided to have some fun with my sweetheart, so as soon as we hit the highway, I yawn expansively and then again and slumping down in my seat belt I give a good performance of dozing off. I lie back against the back of the seat with my head against the rest and my face turned toward Alex as he drives. I make my breathing steady and slow and peek at him through the picket fence of my closed eyelashes.
When he is concentrating on the road ahead, I pull my zipper down about fifty mils and open up the view. I watch for reaction. he looks over at me, sleeping peacefully, and I notice he frowns a little as if ‘I don’t remember that being so open’. I wait for a little and then when he is watching his driving again, I pull the zipper down a hundred mils more and fluff my top open. He looks over again and this time its like ‘is it my imagination or my wishful thinking or is Barb’s top coming open’. I snore on peacefully keeping a close eye on him and when he’s really occupied, passing someone, I pull the zipper down to my navel and pop my left titty out altogether.
I wait, spying through my closed eyelids and this time when he looks over its like “Oh my goodness, where did that come from.” I notice with satisfaction that he stares at my exposed chest for quite some time and then, thorough gentleman that he is, he puts his hand over to pull my top closed. As he does I come alive and grab his hand and pull it onto my exposed and bare breast, uttering a whoop of delight and triumph.
Whilst great fun, this is not the world’s most brilliantly thought out move and Alex, suddenly finding himself in possession of Barb’s bare boob, and a car going at about a hundred kph at the same time, is placed in a difficult position. We skid and swerve and scare a few other motorists shitless and then he gets it all under control and glares at me and shouts “You dopey bitch, do you know what you did?”
“Um Hmmmmn” All innocence.
“Well what.....what...did you think you were doing?”
“Sorry darling...........
......................I couldn’t help myself.”
Looking up from lowered lids with eyes full of mischief and love.
He’s glaring at me and trying to look like really angry, but the downturn of his mouth is fighting to curve up into a grin and then suddenly he laughs out loud and says, “Damn it girl, you..........................”
He looks so downright cute saying this that I throw my arms around his neck and plant a big slobbery kiss on the side of his face. Well he’s ready for me this time and the resultant swerve only just scares a couple of elderly folk into brownies.

We arrive at our picnic spot and the sea is flat and blue and the day is perfect and I know it’s going to be just fan-bloody-tastic.
Time for me to make myself useful and set up camp like the little homemaker woman. I get our stuff out of the car and cart it down to the beach and set up under the shade of an overhanging she-oak. By the time I have finished stuffing around getting it all the way I want, Alex has stripped down to his togs and is ready to hit the waves. (not that there are any.) Well, the ripples anyhow. I take off my top and as there isn’t another soul within cooee, I decide I’ll swim topless. He doesn’t like that and looks suspiciously at every clump of grass along the shore as though it hides an army of perverts with binoculars trained on my tits. I reluctantly don my bra top as it seems only this will make him happy and we run down to the water’s edge.
I am scared shitless of being in water above my knees and I fear that every ripple hides a great white shark that will make Jaws look like a tiddler. But Alex is fearless and much emboldened by his presence I consent to going in until the water reaches my bust. The water is beautiful and clear and cool, but my terror of all things wet makes me most jumpy and nervous but Alex, he just comes over to me and the next thing I find myself being held in his strong arms and embraced and then he’s kissing me on the mouth and we are slipping into the water and I am tingling all over and I give in and surrender to him and we just hug and kiss there in the water and I know that what I want is sex and so I drag him back to the beach.
I draw the line at sex with the sharks.

I reckon we better eat first.
Mostly because if we don’t, we won’t eat at all.
So we sit down on our towels and I serve out the goodies. It’s a nice fresh, light, healthy meal and we both enjoy it although I don’t eat much, but then I never eat much.
Eating time is over and I wash up as well as I can in the stream and then pack up my hamper like a good little haus frau. Now it’s time for me to put on my little playing dead act. No picnic of ours would be complete without my playing dead and Alex finding me and that then leading to all of the really excellent stuff that I know it will and that we both enjoy so very much.
Where the stream breaks out of the scrub and before it courses over the sand to the sea, there is a spot with a small white sand beach and several smooth, lovely, water washed, rounded rocks. It is here that I propose to do my act and todays little scenario has me as a massacred Indian maid, lying dead where the troopers have left me and Alex, the kindly cavalry man comes along, finds me and is then so turned on by my state of deadness that he takes me then and there.
I decide that I will be sprawled out, face down over one of the rocks and he can come up behind me, roll me over onto my back on the sand and then.......well, whacko!! I lie down over the smooth hot rock, my legs stretched out behind me and my face turned to one side and my arms dangling either side of the rock where I have fallen. I am as naked as the day I was born, having stripped off everything I had on before game time started. The rock is smooth and warmed by the sun and my bare skin pressing against it feels so fantastic that I find I am getting very aroused just lying here. I get my head around being dead and start to feel the old familiar excitement of being dead and helpless and awaiting my fate at the hands of my discoverer. I can hear Alex moving up on me and then I feel a little prickling sensation on my right boosy, near the partially erect nipple. I risk a look, trying not to spoil the fantasy and there.......................
“.........Oh shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
A thirty millimetre long godzilla of a lizard has his damned little clawlike feet stuck in my tit.
“Bugger me.!!!”
All pretence is forgotten and I screech like some mad woman and scoot my legs forward in an attempt to get myself upright.
Just at this moment Alex has moved up on his dead Indian maiden and is about to touch her limp body for the first time. Only suddenly she jack-knifes and the result of her wild flailing movements is to fling my generous backside upright with such force that Alex, unable to get clear, is whacked full in the face by my bum.
“Aaaarrgghhhh!!!!” He reels backward, blood spurting from his nose.
I am jumping around like Jack Flash, pawing at my chest and shrieking incomprehensibly. Godzilla is long gone back under some shady rock. This in no way alleviates my full blown panic and I rush around, pawing, yelling, screaming and generally behaving poorly.
“Ghotz the madder Barrrrb.” Spoken through the flow of blood from a tightly held nose.
“Get it off me, get it off me, get it off me............................”
“The bloody lizard, the bloody lizard, shit, didn’t you see it, bloody great lizard.”
“Here, here on my tit.” Thrusting it at him.
“Can’d see anythiggd.”
“It was huge.”
“What happened? Oh...............Sorry about your nose. Did I do that?”
“Oh.” A quick check seems to reveal that Godzilla has indeed gone. “Let me look. I’m sorry let me clean it up............I’m sorry.”
I wash his nose which has stopped bleeding and he checks my bosom and decides that he can’t find any permanent scarring from the lizard’s claws and we both reckon we’re sufficiently recovered to try again.
I lie on my back over the rock this time, hoping that by so doing I’ll be in a better position to see the wildlife coming. I get in the mood again and close my eyes and gape my mouth open.
Errrrrrrrrrpppppppppppp!!!!!!!!! I’ve swallowed a fly.
This time I manage to knee Alex in the balls.

We decide to quit dead play for today and just cuddle on our towels.
I am lying naked with my wonderful lover and man, Alex. Sometimes sex doesn’t have to be all that active. I look at his face, his eyebrows, his mouth, the line of his jaw and I wonder to myself how such simple features that everybody has can be so perfect in one man. His body. The lean sinewy muscularity of his arms and legs. The flat planes of his chest and stomach. So strong and yet so beautiful. So perfect. I compare them in my head to my own small, soft, curved shape and decide that Alex is much the more beautiful human of the two of us. No wonder the great paintings and sculptures of all time show men. Michelangelo, Leonardo, these old guys knew that when God made perfection it was the glorious male. Us gals just came along as an afterthought shaped to fit to the contours of our mate.
Dreamy thoughts, warm afternoon in the sun and in the nude, thoughts.
It’s time to go.
The sun is melting in a pool of golden rays on the horizon of the ocean and the day is over. What perfection. What a wonderful day. Well except for my stuff ups with the creature world. I can still feel that bloody fly buzzing in my tum. I’m sure I can.
A great day.
If only we didn’t have to go to Janelle’s bloody party tomorrow night. I hate her parties, hate the people, the boozing................ and that creep Gordon.

We pack and load everything in the wagon.
I lie back in my seat belt and Alex starts the car and we hum off along the highway. Now what will I thrill him with on the way back?
I’m thinking this over and I must have conked out, because the next thing I know, we’re home and he’s lifting me out of the seat and carrying me inside. I snuggle against him and let myself be carried.
“Darls we should unpack the stuff.”
“No, if we don’t............”
“Tomorrow OK?”
I am very sleepy. He carries me to the bedroom and I undress and shower and lie on the sheets, naked. He comes from the bathroom, also naked and covers me with his wonderful body. He smells so good..............Oh God, I love him. He slips into me and we both start to move. I am so happy, so relaxed, so content.
Somewhere along the line I drift into dreamland and leave him to enjoy himself having necrophiliac fun with my completely and utterly unconscious body .....................