A CANNIBAL CONVERSATION
Posted by Barbanne on January 18, 2004 at 22:24:03:
A CANNIBAL CONVERSATION
"Barbanne darling, come on, come over here."
"Why Valerie?"
"Because I tell you to. For heaven's sake Phyllis, isn't Barbanne an impossible girl?"
"She certainly is. Barbanne do as you're told."
"What are you two going to do to me?"
"Nothing you won't eventually enjoy, now come on over here."
"And another thing Valerie, why did I have to strip totally naked?"
"Oh Barbanne, questions, questions, questions. Just do as you're told girl."
"What's that you've got there Phyllis? Gawd strewth its a bloody great wooden mallet."
"Now Barbanne its just something we sometimes use to tenderise meat."
"Tenderise meat??"
"Yes girl, tenderise meat."
"Well why do you need it now?"
"Well sometimes we bash things with it."
"What?? bash things, what things??"
"Grab her Valerie."
"Ow Valerie let me go. Let go my arms, ow you're hurting twisting them like that."
"NOW Phyllis."
"Ow what are you doing?"
"Hit her here, here, right between the eyes."
"Stop this, it isn't funny, stop it, STOP IT."
"Now Phyllis."
"Why are you doing this to me?"
"You don't get it do you Barbanne? You always were a bit of a dill. Baby you're tonight's main course."
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkk........"
"Stop squealing. OK Phyllis do it."
"Puhleeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzz, let me go, puhleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezzz."
"Oh do be quiet Barbanne."
"Now Barb this won't hurt a bit."
"Says who Phyllis, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaggghhhh......................."
"Stop struggling you silly little girl, hold her still Val."
"Calm down Barbanne."
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKK.....................!!!!!!!!!"
"Oh really what an actress, be quiet."
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK.........................!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Now Phyllis quick, she's busting my eardrums."
"Hold her still, that's it, now.........big backswing."
"EEE............"
THUNK!
"errrrrrrrrgggggg."
THUMP!!!
(Suddenly limp body hits floor)
"God I thought she'd never shut up and stop wriggling. Great shot Phyllis, right between the eyes, hmmmmmm, yep she's dead alright, no pulse at the throat, none at her wrist and when I feel her tits there's no heartbeat. Strewth I know what they mean by poleaxed now, when you whacked her in the forehead she went down like a shot moose."
"More like a brained babe eh?"
"Yeah."
(Giggling)
"Here Phyllis give me a hand, lets roll her on her face yep that's it and you hold her heels together while I lash them with twine."
"Nice feet."
"Yeah pretty feet, now hold them up while I put this big belt around her ankles."
(Grunt)
"OK that's got it now give me a hand to get her up and we'll carry her out to the store and hang her for a while."
"Oooof she weighs a tonne."
"And she's only little, but its sort of dead weight eh?"
"Very dead."
(Giggles)
"Right hook her ankle strap over this hook and there we are. Well Barb that wasn't so bad was it? Strewth its hard to have a conversation when you're trying to talk to someone whose head is down by your knees and upside down. OK Barb, not too awful at all eh? and I just know you're going to cook up something delicious. I mean look at this li'l old rump. Told you you'd enjoy this didn't I?"
(Slap)
"Oooops look what you've done now she's widdling all over herself."
"Well we'll clean her up good later on. I'll have to shave these pubics off and pluck some of these other hairs here and there and of course you can help me wash her inside and out and then we'll get her oiled up. Won't we Barb?"
"Doesn't have much to say does she?"
"No and she was always such a chatty little bird."
"Talking about bird, hanging there with her arms spread out that's just what she looks like, one of those ducks in an Asian street stall, our very own little chook."
"Great well lets leave her to drain for an hour or so and then we'll get her onto the preparation table."
"Better remember to light the oven in plenty of time to let it heat."
"Yeah and we have to cut up heaps of veggies."
"OK. Bye Barb and I wish you'd stop peeing."
"I reckon she's well and truly drained by now."
"OK, lets get her down. You take her arms while I get her body and don't drop her on her head."
"As if she'd care."
"We don't want to bruise the meat Phyllis."
"Oh yukk, what a mess, when you said she'd drain I didn't realise just how much erky stuff she had to lose. Yuuu-uuukk, stringy snot and wow who would have thought a bladder could hold that much."
"I've filled the bath with cold water and I'll clean her up properly soon, but first help me get her onto that table while I get rid of some of this pesky body hair."
"Ooof she's heavy."
"But nice and pliable."
"Really limp and floppy. Makes you wonder how you yourself would be in her place."
"I'm hoping not to find out."
"Me too, well there she is."
"Untie her feet while I lather this brush."
"How's that?"
"Good, only can you spread legs apart so that I can get right inside, yeah that's good."
"This razor's none too sharp and her bush is thick and wiry but it's doing the job, oops, damn it I've nicked her mound."
"Fat lot she cares, her being dead and all."
"Yeah but I gotta care about the presentation and this little pussy, when its succulently roasted, we cut out and serve with clams, its a hugely expensive delicacy."
"Is that true? Sorry then that that happened Barbanne."
"Right well that's done, now pass me those tweezers while I yank out the odd hair here and there that I can see. Thankfully she shaved under her own arms and kept her legs pretty smooth herself."
"What about that mass of curls on her head?"
"We'll coat that with lard and seasoning and it cooks up to a lovely crust, like a little cap on her head."
"Hmmm, she's pretty smooth now. Oh you better tweezer out her nostrils, there's still some naughty little hairs in there."
"That's got it. Now give me a hand and we'll get her into that bath."
"Barbanne, I gotta tell you, you might eventually be first grade meat but right now you're pretty messy girl. And you smell."
(Splash)
"You work up from her feet and I'll work down from her head and rub everything clean."
"Hey this is kinda sexy."
"Sexy schmexy, stop pleasuring yourself with our roast and pass me that plastic bottle, gotta douche the poor darling's body cavities and I mean all of them. I'll fill it with water, that's it, now you hold her head out of the bath while I flush her out with this. That's good yeah. Darn I'm going to need another bottle full. That's got it its gurgling back out of her gob now. Now we'll just repeat that, yep that's good and now let's turn her over."
"We're going to get pretty messed up doing this."
"I know, but roll her onto her face, tits down. Now you haul her ass out of the water and spread her blot hole while I use the bottle to flush out her poop chute."
"Yeeeeuuukkk!!"
"Don't be so squeamish. See she was pretty clean. Now lift her a bit more and we'll rinse her cunt. Can you spread those lips a bit more."
"She's pretty tight in both her asshole and pussy."
"If you'd seen death in the form of a meat mallet coming real close you'd have clenched up too."
"Yeah, I guess that's true."
"Wow that whole bottle full went in and didn't even reach half way, no wonder she was such a popular girl."
"Popular slut you mean."
"That too. Now Barbanne I think you is as clean as a whistle girl so Phyllis spread that towel out on the floor and help me get her out onto it."
"Ta, now while I pat her dry you go and scrub down the table, oh and while you're there get the cooking oil out of the cupboard, the ten litre bottle."
"Will do."
"OK that's done and I have patted her dry again, although her hair's still sopping so give me another lift and lets get her over onto the table."
"Strewth she hasn't gotten any lighter."
"Nope. Alright on my count of three lets swing her up and lay her on her back. One, two, three."
(Floop)
"Great so what now?"
"Now we oil our Barbanne up."
"Poor love."
"You're not feeling sorry for the meat Phyllis?"
"Wouldn't you? Talk about the ultimate humiliation, spread out across this bench, mouth gaping, knees bent and spread, privates yawning open for you and me to look at. Its so demeaning. Poor Barbanne."
"Its going to get worse. I've got a bucket of mashed bananas and honey that we're going to stuff her with. You won't believe how sweet it makes her meat."
"I can't stand the way she's staring at me, its spooky and her tongue's lolling out like some big slug escaping from her mouth. I mean she's freaking me out something awful."
"She's not staring at you, she's just staring, close them if they worry you."
"Ow her eyelids just keep popping open."
"Here use some of this tape we bind up the oven wrap with that'll hold her and hurry we have to have all this done and her in the pan before she starts stiffening up."
"There although she looks wierd with her eyelids taped shut."
"Rubbish it looks very neat, now hold her jaw open while I tuck her tongue back inside."
"Erkk."
"Don't be squeamish, now lift her into a sitting position and tilt her head back. Good now you hold her mouth open while I spoon this banana mixture in. I'll have to push it down her throat with my fingers you keep holding her in that upright position."
"Strewth how much of it does it take?"
"I don't know I've only got another few spoonfuls left I hope it will be enough. Lift that butt cheek up and see how we're doing."
"Yep banana mush is oozing out of her backside, she's full."
"Good. Lift her legs and roll them back while I shove this carrot in her blot, being tapered and all it makes the perfect plug."
"Oil her up now?"
"Sure thing Phyllis you start up here and I'll work up from the feet. And use plenty of oil, don't stint."
"Hey this is fun."
"Just make sure you do it properly."
"Are you kidding I don't think I'll ever leave her tits."
"Just get serious."
"Hey look who's talking you've been oiling inside her pussy for yonks."
"Gotta have it well lubricated for this."
"A cucumber?"
"A lovely curved cucumber jammed hard inside her, there don't you like that? Barbanne's last fuck is with the jolly green giant, ho, ho. OK lets turn her over and do her back."
"This is fun too, can we share working on her buttocks."
"Oh if you insist."
"Now what?"
"Now I put this juicy apple in her teeth, you can open her mouth while I shove it in, open wide now."
"How's that?"
"Perfect. OK Barbanne you're ready for the pan. Do you like that I left the green top on that carrot like a little plume spraying out from her ass."
"Very tasteful, very imaginative too."
"Right, now we're going to lie her face down in the pan, well tits down actually, her face will be up looking at the diners when we serve her. Let them see that juicy apple and her nice teeth, so I want you to put about a centimetre of oil in the bottom of the pan that way we'll really crisp up her nipples. Crisp nipples are highly prized. While you're doing that I'll work this spiced lard into her hair."
"Now if you'll give me a hand we'll lie her in the pan. Ooh wait a minute, nearly forgot, pass me that twine, gotta keep her from coming apart in the oven. I have to tie her big toes together and now help me bring her arms up behind her back and tie her thumbs together. Now she's ready."
"Shall I leave the tape on her eyes?"
"Sure its cook proof to two hundred celsius and she'll do at one eighty for fifteen minutes a kilo. Is the oven ready?"
"Yep."
"Let's lift her in, oops hang on I'll just pop some fennel sprigs into her nostrils. That's it, open the door and lets lift."
"In you go Barbanne."
She's going to be delicious. We'll add the vegetables in about three hours time and we'll take it in turns to baste her although her tits have so much fat under the skin that if we fork them in an hour or so they'll self baste."
"Fantastic. Oh Barbanne you're going to be wonderful, although I gotta say seeing you tits down and ass up and covered in oil in our baking tray you sure look plenty humiliated babe. It must sure be mortifying girl, well it would be if you weren't dead and all sweetheart."
(Sizzle)
(Sizzle)
(Sizzle)
(Sizzle)
(Dah Dah....a big flourish)
( A table of elegant men and women wait to dine. Barbanne, naked, glistening with oil, beautifully browned, mouth chomping on apple, garnished and surrounded by veggies is wheeled in still lying tits down in the baking tray)
"Well folks what do you think of roast Barbanne?"
"Fantastic."
"Great."
"Terrific."
"Really succulent."
"Mouth watering, I can hardly wait."
"Who'll carve?"
"The honour is all yours Valerie."
"OK here goes."