Posted by Ripper X on March 22, 2000 at 07:19:28:
The Motel lounge was bustling with life, Amy Jo Johnson was backed up with the orders, Andrew McCarthy was good when the Brat Pack was active, but as a short order cook, GOD DID HE SUCK!.
She already got stiffed by Michael Douglas, and Catherine Zeta-Jones, Jay Leno coped a feel and demanded a hug before he left, and the bikini she was wearing was creeping so far up her ass that it will probably require surgery to pull it out. There has got to be a better way!
"Hey," Kerri Green asked her, "You ready for a break?"
"YES!" She said.
"Order Up!" Yelled Andrew McCarthy, dinging his dingy bell.
"Oh damn," Amy said, "Thats one of mine . . . screw it, it's just for Regis and he only gives money way if he is on TV, lets go, I've been dying for a cigerette!"
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Melissa Jone Hart quickly located her Red Lacy Panties and Bra.
She didn't know why she was in such a hurry, Britney has no clue as to were Ripper X is staying, it will take her years of searching to find him on her own, besides, Britney is so stupid, because . . . well she didn't know why but she was stupid!
She slipped on the panties and the bra and looked in the mirror.
"Hmmmmmm." She said, coking her head to the left, "Cute, but too trashy."
Ewwwwwww, She ripped off the Red Teddy and ran back to her hotel closet!
She had the perfect idea!.
She pulled out her Leather Black Trench-coat, and slipped it over her nude body.
This will work, but I will have to change my lip liner color, Red will look much sexier now.
She ran back to the Bathroom and washed off the black from her lips, when she heard a huge commotion coming from downstairs, "Christ What are they doing down there? Shooting off fireworks?"
It isn't the 4th of July is it?
If so that means that Ripper is tanked for the day and his plumbing is all fucked up and she is waisting her time.
She walked over to her the Hotel Calender to check out the date.
Nope it wasn't the 4th, and it wasn't the New Year.
"HEY!" She Yelled Stomping her foot on the floor, "Keep it down down there!"
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"Christ, Puffy!" Jennifer Lopez complained, "Were in the hell is our food?"
"Ah, cut the dude a break," Puff Daddy told her, "This place is pretty busy, the cook has a lot of orders to fill out."
"Where is our waitress, I don't even see her anywere?"
"Well she probably took a break on the account of your bitchy ass!"
"Well you were flirting with her!" Jennifer whined, "What do you expect me to do? Just sit back and watch you as you get off on another woman?"
"I wasn't flurting, I was just being nice!" Puffy wisppered violently, "You were the one creating the scene."
"Oh Come on Puffy, I seen how you were eying her tits!"
"Okay, I admit, The gal has nice tits! Is that my fault?
"WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY TITS?!?!?!?!"
"Excuse me Miss. Lopez, but the Gentlemen at the bar has bought you a drink."Ally Sheedy told her quickly as she sat a White Russian down in front of her, spilling half of it.
Puffy and Lopez both looked over to see a smiling Michele Jackson waving, She heard her Puffy pull out his illegal hand gun, she quickly grabed his arm and pulled it down to the table.
"Oh can't you relax for one moment," She pleaded with him, "Everybody knows that that man is gay!"
"That is why I am going to kill him!" Puff Daddy told her, "He thinks that you are a twelve year old boy!"
Just then the sounds of gunshots erupted from the lobby, they could here the screams that sounded like little girls when the Security Gate closed.
Everybody sat there in silence listening to the gun fire, and the screaming that quickly ended.
Michele Jackson was still blowing kisses at Jennifer Lopez as the sound of an army trying to shoot throw the door forced everybody else into panic!
Puff Daddy Aimed his gun Michele Jackson, then pulled the trigger three times!
Each Bullet stopped by his body guards who jumped in the way.
Then He aimed his Gun at the Bullet Riddled security door, along with every NFL Foot Ball player in the place!
"Get Down!" Puffy yelled to Lopez!
All they could do now is wait until they shot there way through the security doors.
"God you are so fucking demanding!" Jen complained taking cover behind the table.
- Rip